Post by Mark Angelus Fri on Dec 24, 2009 21:32:37 GMT -5
Note: This isn't the only gift, I'm working on something much bigger but I doubt I'll get it done in time. Maybe new years or something, anyway enjoy.
Oh great… how did I get myself into this mess…?, Mark thought to himself as he stood in a mall on Earth, with a most miserable face. Now I remember…Harumi wanted to see what Christmas on Earth was like, and when I mentioned where I was going Jasmine had to come with me, and of course Andy as well. Then Profeta heard about it and I couldn’t say no, with her came Kevin and of course Yeligar who wanted to guard Profeta… as if ANYTHING will happen at Christmas eve.
“So… what are we waiting here for?” Jasmine asked peeking over Andy’s shoulder, who stood right beside me.
In front of us stood a very bright, decorated stage with fake snow all over the ground and a candy cane with a throne under it.
“Santa…” I grumbled crossing my arms.
“Okay, but why?” She asked still in confusion.
“I want to wish for someway to get me away from you guys…” I said in the lowest whisper that no one could possibly hear… expect Profeta who slapped me over the head.
“So when is this ‘Santa’ going to come?” Andy asked scratching his head with impatience.
I glanced over at the sign where the kids had gathered, ‘Santa is out’, I frowned, “Looks like not at all…”
“Aw, what about all these kids?” Harumi asked looking at all the kids that had gathered.
“Probably going home like we are…” I said turning around only to get pulled back by Profeta.
“I’ll do it!” Yeligar said making me glance over.
“…Do… what?”
“I’ll become, ‘Santa’!” Yeligar said making my eyes widen.
“Oh god no, please… You don’t know anything about Earth!” I said to Yeligar.
“Yes I do, I did research! Besides a gentlemen wouldn’t let these kids down!” Yeligar yelled walking to the manager.
In a moment or two a man came out of a door in the candy cane dressed in red, Santa Claus… with an eye patch and an intense smell of cigar smoke.
Oh… god… I slapped my head at this, the kids will be ruined.
“Hahaha!” Yeligar yelled making me yell out.
“It’s ‘hohoho’!”
“That’s what I meant, of course,” Yeligar said sitting down in the chair, the kids lining up to see him.
A young boy walked in front of Yeligar, “Hello, Santa!”
“Why hello there,” Yeligar said picking him up, “And what’s your name?”
“Jackson,” the boy squeaked out.
“Okay, Jackson, what would you like for Christmas?” Yeligar asked getting the role as Santa very well. As long as no one points out the eye patch we’re good.
“Before we start, what happen to your eye?” …well I was hopeful, that’s the least I can say.
“Uh…” Yeligar blinked, “..What do you know about Santa?”
“That he delivers presents!” the kids yelled out.
“Well… it turns out that’s only one thing I do, I’ll tell you this. When Russia invaded America I was on the front lines, fighting those sons of… fruit…” My eyes widen… no… he didn’t.
“Then after I assisted the Americans I was shipped over to Task Force 141 to help Price, Soap, Roach and Ghost battle the Russian terrorist and then after my good buddy Roach and Ghost were killed by our General, I assassinated him, which is how I lost my eye.”
Oh my god! He played Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 to research Earth! This is ridiculous! I thought as he went on.
“And not one of those men was left behind…” Yeligar said in a soft voice, wiping his eye of a tear as the kids seemed interested in his story, “Even the teeniest, tiniest person… we got them all…”
“Wow…” all the kids said in awe.
“Now if you excuse me, Santa gotta go wipe his eye…” Yeligar said getting up and walking away.
“Okay, that was interesting. Can we go home now?” I asked once more.
“Never fear Mr. Fri. I’ll be Santa,” Kevin walked up from behind me, drinking some type of soda.
“…you know what, that might not be a bad idea.” I said nodding, “Your cheery, you talk a lot and you might just work as Santa.”
“Exactly, now if you excuse me I got to go become the big red man,” Kevin said walking away.
This might actually go well, he’s already finished with three kids and so far he hasn’t made any stupid slip.
“Sir…?” two men said walking up to Kevin, it was the mall’s security.
Kevin sipped that Soda once more, “Hey there, if you want to tell me your list get in line, pal.”
“It’s not that, we’ve come to talk to you about stolen goods.” The man said making me raise an eye in confusion, they were pointing at his soda.
“This?” he raised his Soda for them to look at it, “Not this, it’s free.”
“No sir, it’s free of calories,” the man corrected as I gritted my teeth.
“No, I don’t think so,” he argued sipping it once more, the man grabbed it away from him. “Hey! Get your own, they’re free!”
“They’re NOT free!” they said pulling him up, “Come with us so we can question you some more.”
“Fine, fine…” Kevin said walking with them quietly, suddenly he hit them away and started running with his drink, “But you’ll never catch me!!!”
Great I see it now, ‘Santa flees from mall security with stolen drink’, this is going to be good.
Profeta sighed stepping away from us, “If you excuse me I have to go catch my idiot.”
“Who’s going to be Santa now?” Harumi asked, I sighed and shrugged.
“Listen, by now I think we killed the kids fantasy’s, Santa fought as an Army Ranger is a war that takes place in 2016, Santa was arrested for stealing a drink. I think we should leave before we do anymore damage,” I said turning around to see three people I wouldn’t have expected, Scarth, Kouichi ((with a hat over his cat ears)) and Angelus with a Christmas hat.
“Whoa, whoa! What are you guys doing here!?” I asked in shock then looked at Angelus, “And you better answer!”
“It may surprise you… but I love Christmas…” Angelus said in the most blank, unbelievable voice ever.
“I thought Lana came here… I guess I was wrong,” Kouichi said looking down.
“I came here because I just love Earth!” Scarth said making my eye twitch.
“…even more reason to go home, come on Harumi!” I yelled trying to get away before anyone else noticed that there was no Santa.
“Hey, Kouichi, there’s no Santa…” Scarth started, “I think I’ll be Santa, I just love kids.”
All at once, Angelus, Kouichi and I all yelled, “NO WAY IN HELL!”
“…Fine…” Scarth answered taking a step back.
“I’ll do it, I think I’ll make a great Santa,” Kouichi said walking away, my god will this day end.
Okay, a couple things: One being that he’s a bit small and young looking but by now I think anything is believable.
And I truly believe this would have worked if it wasn’t for one thing, a horrible, plan killing person… it goes by the name Jasmine Loque.
Who was currently standing in line.
“Andy, Andy look at me, I’m gonna sit on Santa’s lap!” She yelled as Andy slowly bit into a candy bar.
“Yeah… you have fun with that,” he said not turning his head over.
When it came her turn Jasmine walked up to Kouichi sitting on him.
“Ah, uh, hello there Jasmine…” He said being his usual shy self.
“Oh wow, you even know my name that’s amazing!” She suddenly narrowed her eyes, “wait a minute… you’re not Santa.”
“Why of course I am…” He said getting worried.
“No, the book I read said he smelled very good… you smell like a cat,” she said then reached out grabbing his beard and pulling it off, everyone in that room jumped up in surprise, loud screams filling the room as Jasmine jumped up yelling as well.
“He’s a fake! He’s an imposter!” She yelled as Kouichi tried to get his beard back from her, “HE’S NOT THE REAL SANTA!!!”
Andy looked over at Jasmine dumbfounded and then rushed over seeing what looked like Santa trying to attack a girl, was really just Kouichi trying to get his beard back… it didn’t end well, what the kids saw was an orange haired boy beating the crap out poor beardless Santa.
“See what we’ve done? Let’s just go home before anyone else kills Christmas!” I said finally tired of it stepping away, but still a hand stopped me. This time it was Harumi.
“Dad, will you? Become Santa that is?” She asked, I quickly shook my head.
“No way.”
“But what about the kids, what about their Christmas?” She asked but I was still resistant.
“I don’t even know these kids, why should I go out of my way to help someone I don’t even know?” This deserved a glare, which I did get.
“If Mom could hear you she’d smack you,” Harumi said with clear traces of anger.
I closed my eyes taking a deep breath, “..Fine, I’ll do it…”
Here I am, dressed like a fool. A fool in a red… red… whatever this thing is. All I know is I look like a fat jolly man. THOSE THINGS I AM NOT!
Just remember, Mark Angelus Fri does whatever he does to perfection!
“Hohoho!” I said changing my voice and smiling to the children, “I’m all better now, my and that young orange haired boy explained what was going on.”
I waved to Andy who responded by lifting his middle finger to me, I growl and make a not to hit him later on.
“Now, who would like to tell me what they want for Christmas?” The kids jumped up yelling ‘me’ over and over.
“Alright, how about that little girl with the green dress?” I said as the little girl stood up walking to me, I lifted her up on my leg, “So, what’s your name?”
“My name is Masumi,” she said as every bone in my body weakened, what are the chances. Worst chances, whenever I hear that name I break out into tears or get very mad. In this case it was tears.
“Is something wrong, Santa?” The girl asked as I wiped my eyes of tears.
“My wife’s name was Masumi, she was stabbed years ago…” He said attempting to control myself. The little girl graciously pat me on the back saying something like ‘there there’. How old was this girl again… 5?
“Well, Masumi you’ve been very good, very good,” I said as she got off my leg. Taking a moment to clear my emotions I finally spoke again, “Alright who’s next?”
Suddenly a booming loud voice rose across the crowd, “SANTA! SANTA!”
I looked over to see a man I’ve only seen once… Grey was it?
Grey rushed over pushing both adults and kids out of the way, “Move it kid I’ve been waiting 1018 years for this!”
He said then sat on my leg, how awkward was this.
“I’ve been very good this year, you know. Kain told me over and over ‘Santa is not real, grow up, dude’ but darn it I knew that Santa was real!” Grey said with eyes of a young boy.
“Did you just push those kids?” I asked pointing to the kids.
“No…”Grey shook his head.
“Are you sure, because I’m pretty sure I saw what I saw,” I said but he just shook his head.
“I think Santa is having a little trouble seeing,” Grey chuckled, my gaze turned into a sharp glare.
“Go away…”
Grey looked at me then got up, “Fine…” he said walking away like a three year old who had just been punished.
To put things short I was there for the next four hours till it was closely time and I got out, finally able to head to the room we rented.
“See, that wasn’t so bad, right?” Harumi asked as I slipped my hat over my head to protect from the cold.
“There have been worse things I’ve done…” I said as we walked down the now dark streets, the group behind us.
Harumi laughed a bit grabbing my arm, “Merry Christmas, Dad.”
“Yeah, you too Harumi.” I nodded, it might not have been as bad as I thought. Okay so kids now believe America had been invaded by Russians and Santa is a badass for fighting them, also he likes to steal stuff and gets beat up by orange haired guys. But still, it wasn’t that bad.
Oh great… how did I get myself into this mess…?, Mark thought to himself as he stood in a mall on Earth, with a most miserable face. Now I remember…Harumi wanted to see what Christmas on Earth was like, and when I mentioned where I was going Jasmine had to come with me, and of course Andy as well. Then Profeta heard about it and I couldn’t say no, with her came Kevin and of course Yeligar who wanted to guard Profeta… as if ANYTHING will happen at Christmas eve.
“So… what are we waiting here for?” Jasmine asked peeking over Andy’s shoulder, who stood right beside me.
In front of us stood a very bright, decorated stage with fake snow all over the ground and a candy cane with a throne under it.
“Santa…” I grumbled crossing my arms.
“Okay, but why?” She asked still in confusion.
“I want to wish for someway to get me away from you guys…” I said in the lowest whisper that no one could possibly hear… expect Profeta who slapped me over the head.
“So when is this ‘Santa’ going to come?” Andy asked scratching his head with impatience.
I glanced over at the sign where the kids had gathered, ‘Santa is out’, I frowned, “Looks like not at all…”
“Aw, what about all these kids?” Harumi asked looking at all the kids that had gathered.
“Probably going home like we are…” I said turning around only to get pulled back by Profeta.
“I’ll do it!” Yeligar said making me glance over.
“…Do… what?”
“I’ll become, ‘Santa’!” Yeligar said making my eyes widen.
“Oh god no, please… You don’t know anything about Earth!” I said to Yeligar.
“Yes I do, I did research! Besides a gentlemen wouldn’t let these kids down!” Yeligar yelled walking to the manager.
In a moment or two a man came out of a door in the candy cane dressed in red, Santa Claus… with an eye patch and an intense smell of cigar smoke.
Oh… god… I slapped my head at this, the kids will be ruined.
“Hahaha!” Yeligar yelled making me yell out.
“It’s ‘hohoho’!”
“That’s what I meant, of course,” Yeligar said sitting down in the chair, the kids lining up to see him.
A young boy walked in front of Yeligar, “Hello, Santa!”
“Why hello there,” Yeligar said picking him up, “And what’s your name?”
“Jackson,” the boy squeaked out.
“Okay, Jackson, what would you like for Christmas?” Yeligar asked getting the role as Santa very well. As long as no one points out the eye patch we’re good.
“Before we start, what happen to your eye?” …well I was hopeful, that’s the least I can say.
“Uh…” Yeligar blinked, “..What do you know about Santa?”
“That he delivers presents!” the kids yelled out.
“Well… it turns out that’s only one thing I do, I’ll tell you this. When Russia invaded America I was on the front lines, fighting those sons of… fruit…” My eyes widen… no… he didn’t.
“Then after I assisted the Americans I was shipped over to Task Force 141 to help Price, Soap, Roach and Ghost battle the Russian terrorist and then after my good buddy Roach and Ghost were killed by our General, I assassinated him, which is how I lost my eye.”
Oh my god! He played Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 to research Earth! This is ridiculous! I thought as he went on.
“And not one of those men was left behind…” Yeligar said in a soft voice, wiping his eye of a tear as the kids seemed interested in his story, “Even the teeniest, tiniest person… we got them all…”
“Wow…” all the kids said in awe.
“Now if you excuse me, Santa gotta go wipe his eye…” Yeligar said getting up and walking away.
“Okay, that was interesting. Can we go home now?” I asked once more.
“Never fear Mr. Fri. I’ll be Santa,” Kevin walked up from behind me, drinking some type of soda.
“…you know what, that might not be a bad idea.” I said nodding, “Your cheery, you talk a lot and you might just work as Santa.”
“Exactly, now if you excuse me I got to go become the big red man,” Kevin said walking away.
This might actually go well, he’s already finished with three kids and so far he hasn’t made any stupid slip.
“Sir…?” two men said walking up to Kevin, it was the mall’s security.
Kevin sipped that Soda once more, “Hey there, if you want to tell me your list get in line, pal.”
“It’s not that, we’ve come to talk to you about stolen goods.” The man said making me raise an eye in confusion, they were pointing at his soda.
“This?” he raised his Soda for them to look at it, “Not this, it’s free.”
“No sir, it’s free of calories,” the man corrected as I gritted my teeth.
“No, I don’t think so,” he argued sipping it once more, the man grabbed it away from him. “Hey! Get your own, they’re free!”
“They’re NOT free!” they said pulling him up, “Come with us so we can question you some more.”
“Fine, fine…” Kevin said walking with them quietly, suddenly he hit them away and started running with his drink, “But you’ll never catch me!!!”
Great I see it now, ‘Santa flees from mall security with stolen drink’, this is going to be good.
Profeta sighed stepping away from us, “If you excuse me I have to go catch my idiot.”
“Who’s going to be Santa now?” Harumi asked, I sighed and shrugged.
“Listen, by now I think we killed the kids fantasy’s, Santa fought as an Army Ranger is a war that takes place in 2016, Santa was arrested for stealing a drink. I think we should leave before we do anymore damage,” I said turning around to see three people I wouldn’t have expected, Scarth, Kouichi ((with a hat over his cat ears)) and Angelus with a Christmas hat.
“Whoa, whoa! What are you guys doing here!?” I asked in shock then looked at Angelus, “And you better answer!”
“It may surprise you… but I love Christmas…” Angelus said in the most blank, unbelievable voice ever.
“I thought Lana came here… I guess I was wrong,” Kouichi said looking down.
“I came here because I just love Earth!” Scarth said making my eye twitch.
“…even more reason to go home, come on Harumi!” I yelled trying to get away before anyone else noticed that there was no Santa.
“Hey, Kouichi, there’s no Santa…” Scarth started, “I think I’ll be Santa, I just love kids.”
All at once, Angelus, Kouichi and I all yelled, “NO WAY IN HELL!”
“…Fine…” Scarth answered taking a step back.
“I’ll do it, I think I’ll make a great Santa,” Kouichi said walking away, my god will this day end.
Okay, a couple things: One being that he’s a bit small and young looking but by now I think anything is believable.
And I truly believe this would have worked if it wasn’t for one thing, a horrible, plan killing person… it goes by the name Jasmine Loque.
Who was currently standing in line.
“Andy, Andy look at me, I’m gonna sit on Santa’s lap!” She yelled as Andy slowly bit into a candy bar.
“Yeah… you have fun with that,” he said not turning his head over.
When it came her turn Jasmine walked up to Kouichi sitting on him.
“Ah, uh, hello there Jasmine…” He said being his usual shy self.
“Oh wow, you even know my name that’s amazing!” She suddenly narrowed her eyes, “wait a minute… you’re not Santa.”
“Why of course I am…” He said getting worried.
“No, the book I read said he smelled very good… you smell like a cat,” she said then reached out grabbing his beard and pulling it off, everyone in that room jumped up in surprise, loud screams filling the room as Jasmine jumped up yelling as well.
“He’s a fake! He’s an imposter!” She yelled as Kouichi tried to get his beard back from her, “HE’S NOT THE REAL SANTA!!!”
Andy looked over at Jasmine dumbfounded and then rushed over seeing what looked like Santa trying to attack a girl, was really just Kouichi trying to get his beard back… it didn’t end well, what the kids saw was an orange haired boy beating the crap out poor beardless Santa.
“See what we’ve done? Let’s just go home before anyone else kills Christmas!” I said finally tired of it stepping away, but still a hand stopped me. This time it was Harumi.
“Dad, will you? Become Santa that is?” She asked, I quickly shook my head.
“No way.”
“But what about the kids, what about their Christmas?” She asked but I was still resistant.
“I don’t even know these kids, why should I go out of my way to help someone I don’t even know?” This deserved a glare, which I did get.
“If Mom could hear you she’d smack you,” Harumi said with clear traces of anger.
I closed my eyes taking a deep breath, “..Fine, I’ll do it…”
Here I am, dressed like a fool. A fool in a red… red… whatever this thing is. All I know is I look like a fat jolly man. THOSE THINGS I AM NOT!
Just remember, Mark Angelus Fri does whatever he does to perfection!
“Hohoho!” I said changing my voice and smiling to the children, “I’m all better now, my and that young orange haired boy explained what was going on.”
I waved to Andy who responded by lifting his middle finger to me, I growl and make a not to hit him later on.
“Now, who would like to tell me what they want for Christmas?” The kids jumped up yelling ‘me’ over and over.
“Alright, how about that little girl with the green dress?” I said as the little girl stood up walking to me, I lifted her up on my leg, “So, what’s your name?”
“My name is Masumi,” she said as every bone in my body weakened, what are the chances. Worst chances, whenever I hear that name I break out into tears or get very mad. In this case it was tears.
“Is something wrong, Santa?” The girl asked as I wiped my eyes of tears.
“My wife’s name was Masumi, she was stabbed years ago…” He said attempting to control myself. The little girl graciously pat me on the back saying something like ‘there there’. How old was this girl again… 5?
“Well, Masumi you’ve been very good, very good,” I said as she got off my leg. Taking a moment to clear my emotions I finally spoke again, “Alright who’s next?”
Suddenly a booming loud voice rose across the crowd, “SANTA! SANTA!”
I looked over to see a man I’ve only seen once… Grey was it?
Grey rushed over pushing both adults and kids out of the way, “Move it kid I’ve been waiting 1018 years for this!”
He said then sat on my leg, how awkward was this.
“I’ve been very good this year, you know. Kain told me over and over ‘Santa is not real, grow up, dude’ but darn it I knew that Santa was real!” Grey said with eyes of a young boy.
“Did you just push those kids?” I asked pointing to the kids.
“No…”Grey shook his head.
“Are you sure, because I’m pretty sure I saw what I saw,” I said but he just shook his head.
“I think Santa is having a little trouble seeing,” Grey chuckled, my gaze turned into a sharp glare.
“Go away…”
Grey looked at me then got up, “Fine…” he said walking away like a three year old who had just been punished.
To put things short I was there for the next four hours till it was closely time and I got out, finally able to head to the room we rented.
“See, that wasn’t so bad, right?” Harumi asked as I slipped my hat over my head to protect from the cold.
“There have been worse things I’ve done…” I said as we walked down the now dark streets, the group behind us.
Harumi laughed a bit grabbing my arm, “Merry Christmas, Dad.”
“Yeah, you too Harumi.” I nodded, it might not have been as bad as I thought. Okay so kids now believe America had been invaded by Russians and Santa is a badass for fighting them, also he likes to steal stuff and gets beat up by orange haired guys. But still, it wasn’t that bad.
This is a fantastic present!
. 
. Anyway yes, I thought you might have liked that part.
